As any girl in the dating world will tell you, you can tell pretty much all you need to know about a potential boyfriend from the house he keeps. We’re not saying emotional maturity is reflected in one’s furniture … except, yeah, we kinda are.
It’s not about whether or not the guy has money; it’s about whether or not he’s learned to make his house a home without Mom’s help. So, without further ado, we’d like to present 10 home goods that separate the men from the boys.
More Than One Towel
Some guys will seem to be so grown up, but will have been drying themselves with the same fraying towel for six to eight months, because “it still works!” That towel will smell like seaweed and sewage. Bonus: a bathmat!
Other non-essential toiletries are also accepted here. Q-Tips are a sign of a leisurely trip to the grocery / drug store, where you have time to think, Now what could I use in my house?
Hooch that is just around and not for immediate drinking purposes, that is. Walking into a guy’s house and watching him rifle through his fridge looking for that wine/liquor that’s just been sitting in the back for a while always filled me with hope that I wasn’t dealing with an alcoholic.
A futon or a mattress just sitting on the floor will not do. Those metal bed frames that may be prison-issue are a good start.
A luxury kitchen item for a young man, because you can just use the pot and a plate / lid / your hand to execute the same task. A man with a strainer indicates either lots of spare income or a yen for cooking, and if you haven’t yet talked about past relationships, this may be a clue that he lived with a woman before.
This guy might have been married before.
Or at least some kind of enclosure around his DVDs and electronics. An Xbox 360 is a fine thing to have, but an Xbox sitting on top of two dented boxes of cereal is no good. DVD racks, guys — they help you see what you have.
For when a young man gets tired of gumming up the edges of his “Kill Bill” poster with tape.
See also: something on the bed other than a dorm-issue blanket. We’re not asking for 300-thread-count sheets or tons of pillows, but, you know, sheets are nice. As are actual comforters. If the bed is too decked out, however, we get suspicious about your motives.
Perishable Food Stuff
it sounds silly, but how many guys’ houses have you been to where the only things in the kitchen are stale cereal, a thing of butter and a jar of pickles? How are you eating, guys?
This is just a helpful guide for ladies out there who are unsure of how to take in the glut of knowledge that comes with seeing a man’s home for the first time. The first time I went to my now-husband’s house, he was lacking signs 1, 5, 6, 9 and 10, so take this with a grain of salt!
Did we miss any signs of a grown man’s home? Tell us in the comments!